Friday, January 5, 2018

be it resolved that...

I don’t usually post New Year’s resolutions, but this year I’d like to capture them. Here goes:

1. Playing basketball regularly, as well as controlling portion sizes, means I have dropped down to 184lbs (I was around 200lbs a year ago) and can fit into 34” pants and even some M shirts! My goal is to get down to 165 or so, though that is less important than slimming down and getting rid of more abdominal excess, and building strength. Time to truly take advantage of having a fitness trainer for a wife. Maybe I’ll still do that Spartan race this summer...

2. Building on that, I have started reorganizing the basement and will be doing some major editing. At some point in the near future I will be getting rid of a lot of redundant art supplies, books (literature, poetry, art books and magazines, and theology), CDs, and DVDs. Let me know if you’d like to take a look through before they go to a bin. This will enable me to clear out a space for Lisa’s exercise equipment so she can do training here.

3. In turn, this will mean a fresh start for me to make art again. It’s been years since I got my hands dirty making art. It’s become paralyzing. Hence the editing—having too much material is overwhelming. Where to begin? Time to get back at drawing and painting, and to pursue some exhibition opportunities. 

4. Naturally, I plan to keep writing poetry (#NaPoWriMo, anyone?), and to actually start submitting poems to publications, in addition to pursuing a more intentional and intimate connection to a (local) writing community. I want to find a way to get some real and considered critique for my writing. Let me know if you’re interested.

5. I will finally get serious about learning to play the guitar. There are numerous reasons for this, but foremost is the necessity of defeating my tendency to procrastinate, which manifests itself in far too many areas: not calling or texting or getting together with friends and family, not addressing household issues or projects, missing deadlines for grants and projects, and more—both personally and professionally. 

6. I will try to deal with the anger that always seems to be simmering just beneath the surface. It’s easy to point to external elements and justify my actions, but the fact is that anger only points to something lacking within me, whether it is disappointment, fear, hopelessness or faithlessness. I must face it and break its power in my life. 

I want to end 2018 being better than I was in 2017, with more creativity and grace and passion. I want to be more thankful and proactive, rather than resigned. I want to be more brave. I want to be a better husband, father, brother, son and friend. I want to be more than a prisoner of hope—rather, I want to walk dreams out in faith. I’m willing to do the work. I hope you’re willing to do some encouraging.