forgiveness

I

it was not at all
what I expected. nothing
really changed.
not then.

later, however –
later it was all
 
different. later,
there was recognition
of loss. the violence
of assumption
lost. something
we both took
from each other.

yours was the better bargain.


II

at that moment
all i felt was surprise.
that you didn’t stop
wouldn’t stop
when I asked, stop

i carried all that
unspoken
for years,
the weight
of that exchange
growing larger.
then forgotten.
or ignored.


III

i recognize the weight
of chains, what burdens
i carried forward.

i remember how sharp
the hook, how deeply
buried, sweetly disbursed.

this is how we share
and in this sharing
i carry it away.

all that waiting.